When The Passing Of A Loved One Means Much More

Life is a gift, bestowed on us by an entity incomprehensible. He gave us life to come serve Him on earth, each with his purpose and destiny, but some have their lives cut short and ended abruptly without fulfilling those goals or purposes. They leave behind a retinue of family, friends and people whose lives have been impacted one way or another by these dearly departed souls. And let me be specific about the kind of lost ones I’m talking about, they’re the ones who know their destinies and purposes; the ones that work in line with God’s plan for their lives; the ones who serve and worship Him; the ones whose lives you look at and you want to be more like them.

I’m sure you can point to this kind of people in your life presently. Now imagine losing them, put yourself in the shoes of others who have lost persons like this. My brother, Victory wrote about leaving a good legacy behind before you pass just a few months ago, but I’m going to take it from another perspective: learning from those who have passed.

I have lost three of such people in the short time of my existence, two actually in the last year. I know what it feels like to know the pain of not being able to see them again, to talk to them again, to have them counsel and advice you anymore. I have felt that pain thrice in my life and even writing this now I’m heavy of heart. They are here one day and gone the next, here one hour and gone the next, here one second and gone the next.

When you are told he/she is gone, all you think of is ‘this has got to be a joke’. You might laugh it off and just take it as someone pulling a prank on you, but when you hear it from another person and yet another, it starts to sink in. You then start to wonder why, you question the reasons why, you analyze what might and might not have happened.

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But who most people question most is God, we ask why He would let someone so good and righteous leave this earth, we ponder His intentions, some of us even lose sight of His plans for our lives because of our grief. We start to question his very existence, asking questions like: ‘why would God even if He exists allow such to happen?’ ‘Why will He look around and of all the people He has to take, He takes the good ones?’

I won’t lie, I’ve had those kind of thoughts pass through my mind on more than one occasion, I’ve sat down and wondered why we have to live a good life even though its longevity isn’t assured. I’ve found myself thinking ‘wouldn’t it just be great to do what I want to do and enjoy my life to the fullest without thoughts of being or doing good, perhaps it might be any day now?’ If I tell u I have an answer to all these questions and thoughts I am a liar. But I’ve come to realize something very important about our lives, it’s a continual battle between the force of good and evil; heaven and hell; Angels and demons.

There are forces that are at work around us that even we can’t imagine. With this in mind, I know that my Father, the one who sculptured me to be unique, the one who gave me breath, the one who sees me through the night doesn’t just back down from a battle. He doesn’t run away from a fight. He doesn’t and would never raise a white flag to the forces of the devil. In my grieve I looked at the life of Jesus and how God allowed him to die and save us all. I call that tactical warfare. And I want to believe that even today, some people live their lives righteously and godly, doing good to others and not knowing when the end will come. God in His infinite mercies in order to teach and to save others ,takes them home. He takes them at that time to minister into the souls of others around them and turn their lives around for the better.

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I was speaking to a friend sometimes ago about a mutual friend we lost and he told me something that’ll stick to me for as long as I live. He told me that our late friend was now his conscience. He said whenever he wanted to do anything wrong his mind would ask him what would your friend have done in this situation. I was amazed by what he said and that has made him a better person for it. He now considers and thinks through whatever choice he wants to make. He might not be perfect but I know he’s moving towards it day by day and this is just a lesson he drew from a late friend.

I lost an aunt I learnt something vital from, she was an ever smiling, ever loving person. I can actually say I’ve never seen her angry before.  To her anger was a wasted expression of emotions, it was necessary sometimes but dwelling on it was just a waste of valuable time. She preferred to share love and happiness instead. She wouldn’t know this because I never told her, but I learnt that from her. Sitting and listening to people talk about her, I find out that we all virtually learnt the same thing from her life and she has touched countless peoples lives just by smiling and they now are learning to do what she had done.

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I’m not here to tell you that your grieve isn’t necessary or worth your time, please you are allowed to grieve, but please learn something valuable from that person’s life as he/she moves on. And if there’s nothing valuable to learn from a loved one, learn to not live like they lived. It’ll help you see life in a new dimension.

Written by Seun Ojewale

Have you ever been through a situation like this? Do you have any thoughts relating to this? Don’t forget to drop a comment!

Other insightful reads are:

5 Things People Will Want To Know About You When You Die

5 Reasons Why You Should Write Your Autobiography Now

A Special Prayer You Should Pray

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Oluwaseun Ojewale

I love to read, and I dabble into writing as inspiration leads..

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